Tales: Witches

colorful costume monster mask
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I want to believe that everyone has seen the 1990 movie The Witches. The Witches along with The Goonies, Home Alone, My Girl, and Hook were movies that entertained, but also fostered my imagination as a kid.  Last week I rented The Witches on Amazon and re-watched it out of curiosity.  I wanted to see how it aged with the outdated special effects and puppetry. I thought I would watch it and laugh at it and realize how silly I was to find the Grand High Witch so frightening. Instead, it bought back memories of summers spent with my cousins trying to conjure up fairytales in our minds. I absolutely adored this movie but was shocked to find out it performed poorly at the box office. There is a certain mystique about witches and how they are portrayed on camera that draws me in. While I might consider myself to be a horror snob, I take movies about witches as they come and can enjoy anything from Hocus Pocus, Witches of Eastwick, to Rosemary’s Baby and the Blair Witch.

Spoiler Alert: For those who have not seen this movie, I will go on to say that if you like Jim Henderson productions, then this is the movie for you. The film begins in Norway with a grandma telling her grandson (Luke) about witches. Luke believes his grandma is telling him bedtime stories, but she has some experience with witches. She goes on to tell him to look out for wig wearing, purple eye women with no toes who hate the smell of children. Later, Luke’s parents die leaving him with his grandma, which forces them to move back to England, where at some point they decide to take a short holiday at a seaside hotel. This hotel happens to be the place where all witches from the UK are gathering for a convention. This is the place where the Grand High Witch makes a special appearance to discuss her evil plot of poisoning kids with candy laced with a transformation spell. One thing leads to another, and Luke and another child is force-fed the potion. Luke in mouse form then fights back and lets the witches have a taste of their own medicine. In the end, Luke is returned to normal and left with tons of money and a list of witches in America and all over the world. The movie ends in a way that seems to hint at the idea that maybe Luke and his grandma used the money and the Grand High Witches’ contacts to hunt down other evil witches.

I have never met a kid who grew up in the 90s who didn’t like this movie, so I was thrilled to hear they were rehashing it. Every time I hear news about the remaking of a classic, I always get excited thinking of the possibilities. Then PTSD sets in and I start thinking of other movies that were reboots or sequels that turned into flops. In the words of Alexander Rodgers who happen to be a YouTuber I enjoy listening to, “I am sick of reboots, remakes, and rehashes”.  There are many movies that I think deserves a sequel or remake, but sometimes it’s better to leave things well alone. While I have doubts that “The Witches” in 2020 will go on to be a classic like the 1990 original, I still see potential. I will walk into this movie wanting to love it, I am sure of that, I just hope it lets me down gently if it’s not going to deliver.

I generally write my blogs for ghosts, but I will ask this question anyway.

Did anyone watch The Witches? If so what about it did you like or dislike?



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